Just do it!
Just get out of the nutshell!
It was what i thought during the moments. But then, i can’t fool myself that it was something i purposely did. Even, i can’t stop questioning why i was that bad.
Really, it’s difficult to get through this (i thought) little thing. And in fact, i had to make some efforts to heal myself; also, had to keep telling myself that there was no right or wrong in this case, the case that i’d never thought of before, the case of breaking the norm/ rules (of mysef), the case of living (i assume) to the utmost of the “being” (or the human, i dont know)
For several hours, i was laying there, thinking about what i should say in the following morning. Just keep silent, pretending nothing had happened. That was my 1st thought and i did.
But then, after a long day, after getting back home and taking a warm shower, after sitting down and thinking back, i just realised that there is no reason for not confronting it. If all the things are to be retold, i would just simply put it in black and white. That i remember and appreciate them all. That I would not bring them to any further (i hope). And that would be a very sweet secret.
Still, it’s not a little thing as i thought. For the next few days, I would keep singing “tiến thoái lưỡng nan đi về lần đận …” (Trịnh)